Leaders Eat Last by Simon Sinek (2014)

TL;DR: Real leaders make people feel safe. In times of danger, they put themselves in harm's way to protect another, and would no sooner give up what they have for their people to live on.

The book opens that people have a fundamental need for security. Safety. Simon Sinek describes this Circe of Safety, where feelings of belonging, of shared values and a deep sense of empathy fosters trust and cooperation.

Leaders have a responsibility that this circle is in place and people inside have a responsibility to look after each other.

Truly Human Leadership protects an organization from the internal rivalries that can shatter a culture .When we have to protect ourselves from each other, the whole organization suffers. But when trust and cooperation thrive internally, we pull together and the organization grows stronger as a result.

One such example of concern and empathy, rather than contempt from our leaders is when 

If we are having a bad day at work and our performance is suffering, instead of yelling at us, we wish our bosses would ask us ,"Are you okay?"

And how we feel at work carries over with our personal relationships and families. One surprising research study found that: 

Children are better off having a parent who works into the night in a job they love than a parent works shorter hours but comes home unhappy. [...] Working late does not negatively affect our children but rather, how we feel at work does.

And it looks like we are biologically programmed for both cooperation and competition. Simon discusses four hormones. Endorphins and Dopamine stirs what we do as individuals. Serotonin and Oxytocin allows us to work together and trust each other.

(I guess you could go into a chicken-and-egg which came first debate. Did the conditions for the hormones cause their appearance or did the hormones cause the conditions? This was not explored.)

Anyhow, Endorphins mask physical pain. Dopamine stimulates feelings of progress or accomplishment. They are the Selfish Chemicals. Serotonin boosts feelings of pride, and the feeling we get when we perceive that others like or respect us. Oxytocin stimluates feelings of friendship, love or deep trust. These are the Selfless Chemicals. Outside of these four, the stress hormone: Cortisol

that "gut" feeling that they, the gazelle and the rest of us get that something dangerous is lurking. [...] first level of fight or flight response

With a strong Circle of Safety, the selfless chemicals are abundant. Where people feel in danger and continually have to prove themselves, the selfish chemicals and cortisol are plenty. It is then a leader's responsibility to strike a balance between competition and cooperation.

The next half is more of a retelling of the generations and they behave at the workforce. Simon recounts how the generation who grew up in the great depression tended to be very frugal. The generation during the 2nd World War had to work regardless. The generation after the war experienced a period of abundance, one which saw how their parents worked on something they never really wanted to do. And then generation at the age of the internet, which tended to be impatient, risk-seeking and "entitled".

With this Simon clarifies that abundance may not be the problem, perhaps it's the way people are led, the way lessons are taught and how human concepts get watered down the bigger an organization gets. The Abstraction

By its very nature, scale creates distance, and at a distance, human concepts start losing their meaning. [...] It is not the abundance we need to manage, or restrict, It is the abstraction. 

How do you manage Abstraction?

1. Keep it real - Bring people together
2. Keep it manageable - This means, for larger organizations, the only way to manage the scale and keep the circle of safety strong is to rely on hierarchies
3. Meet the people you help - our bosses telling us how important our work is, is nowhere near as powerful as us getting to see it ourselves
4. Give them time, not just money
5. Be Patient

The next chapters fall into what one can classify as business cases; stories of how businesses end up when its leaders prioritize their own self-interests. And finally a call-to-action that the world needs more leaders. Real Leaders.

Review:

I now understand some of the criticism being hurled at Simon Sinek for being an idealist of a corporate utopia. I like the thought and I know of the feeling being in one of those teams where a Circle of Safety exists. What's quite unclear is, are we really at the mercy of the one on top: the leader? Hard to say because I also know of the feeling being in one of those teams where you are constantly on guard.

Nevertheless, as a literary creation, I wish the biological connection was explored more and the generational differences expounded. The business cases were very informative.