booknewb

This is it It's time This is the grace period It has arrived This is the tunnel at the end of the light It's far but's it's there

I had this conversation with a friend before. It was at a campus job fair in Valenzuela. It was at the end of the day, and the students were filtering out; going to their classes, going home, going somewhere. Me: I miss going to college She: Yea Me:  I t was not easy. Come to think of it, It seemed like the most important thing in the world back then. Like the problems were the hardest;  a paper barely finished, or a defense thing just about to come up.  But now looking back, they seemed minor compared to now.   She: (a mumbled group of words i can't remember now) Me: Do you ever think your future self is thinking about you now?  What would they say? Do you think they'd be saying the same thing?  

This new year, i made a resolution. I called it a counter-intuitive resolution. I wanted something i haven't had in a long time. It's counter-intuitive, because i could never have it. I could, but i wouldn't. There are circumstances beyond my moral reasoning. I'm too nice for my own good. I believed that your happiness shouldn't be at the expense of another. How can you be happy if you're taking something away from someone's idea of happiness? Anyway, i figured it's an easy resolution to make. Plus, it's one resolution i would gladly fail. If I fail at it, I win. If succeed, well, too bad.  The months came, i keep succeeding. It's like winning but it's heart-breaking at the same time. I've learned a lot these past few months. I've rediscovered emotions that have been unfamiliar to me in a long time. I feel i'm more aware now.  I have this thought i typed in my phone: May 23, 2014  "It's a positive thing to k...